8-7-19 – Revive Podcast with Julie Pearson
Julie Pearson 00:10
Good morning welcome to revive with Julie Pearson. Thanks for tuning in and joining my show. Revive is a place where women can enter into and draw new strength and energy for your life today. [Musical composition in the back ground]
Alright, good morning welcome to revive podcast with Julie Pearson. This is a place where you are going to hear inspiring stories and testimonies of women who have been restored by God in some of the most difficult areas is in their life. And the goal of this program is just to encourage you with words to renew your strength anytime and anywhere because, in today’s world of technology, you can listen to an encouraging message anytime and anywhere.
So I’m so glad that you’ve joined us here today and revived podcast, we also are aired live on Facebook every Wednesday from 10 to 11 am and Pacific Time. And so if you’re joining us on Facebook right now, thank you so much for tuning in. And I just love to engage with my audience. So if you are a Facebook listener, do me a favour say, hello, give me a thumbs-up, maybe make a comment, say how much you liked my blouse today or you know what, give me one of the best emojis you can ever give.
So I just like to know who’s out there listening live. And definitely, if you are listening live, this is a chance for you to interact and this is a chance for you to ask our guests Question maybe make a comment. I believe that maybe she can give away one of her boxes to what we always like to pick someone who has engaged with us on our show and give away a book or something. So if you are a live listener, we will give you away, one of my guests and she’ll talk about it in a while. One of her ministry boxes called: loved and blessed, so stay tuned and we’ll talk more about that.
But again, we’re at revived podcast we are now on the podcast and we are not just on Facebook and online radio but we are a podcast. So I want to encourage you all to download: go to iTunes or pod bean or Spotify, any of your favourite podcast platforms and search in the search bar revive Julie or revive Julie Pearson and you will see me come right up. And so just want to encourage you to add that to your library of podcasts, because again, this show is all about having stories of other women and how you can be encouraged and uplifted by the story of another woman.
So thank you for helping me out as well and being a fan. And, again, I’m new at this podcast thing, so any reviews, any likes, and shares would be wonderful. Beginners, it’s always scary to begin things, right? But also, there’s another chance that you can engage with us today if you are alive. You can actually call in; you can call in and ask a question for our guests, make a comment. If you are a brave soul and would like to call in today and make your voice known, please do so: the number is 712-775-7984 and you can push code 205492.
Alright, well, let’s get to our show. I do want to just I introduce our speaker here in just a minute, but our theme for today is so good, I love it. Man, our guest has quite a story that she’s going to share, and I believe this theme and this title of our show today really represent her story which is an encouragement in the broken dream. We are going to be talking about broken dreams and that’s hard to keep going. There’s a lot of disappointment that comes with broken dreams. So our quote of the day we always start our podcasts off with some sort of quote, I get busy on Google and I research a quote that I think would be a great start to the show. So here’s one from David bird. David says, all the disappointments, the broken dreams, and the deep dark experiences will soon be forgotten and blotted out like a bad dream. Thank God and when that glorious Dawn of heaven arrives. So that is all of our broken dreams are going to be blotted out when we get to heaven one day, right and they are they seem like a bad dream. Broken Dreams are bad dreams, right? Nobody likes bad dreams.
Alright, so our guest today is Jamila Jackson, and let me get her bio up here really quick. Jamila is a woman with a heart for encouraging others. Although she has always wanted to be a mother, which was her dream, God has helped her overcome the depression and hopelessness that accompany her infertility by giving her a new area. She is the founder of loving blessed community and lengthy care packages for women. And her message is one of hope that will inspire you to celebrate the joys and keep moving forward through the challenges of each day. Welcome to knowledge Jackson to revive podcasts.
Jamila Jackson 05:37
Thank you so much, Julie. I’m excited to be here.
Julie Pearson 05:39
Yes, we are so excited you are here today too and I’m so excited because I recently have been having a lot of my podcasts mobile. And it’s so fun to have someone actually who lives in Southern California.
Jamila Jackson 05:51
Julie Pearson 05:52
To be on the show and I just want to make that quick announcement. If you’re listening out there, and you would like to share your story, I would love to get in contact with you. This is a great place to share your story and share what God has done. So if that is you who is listening, and you’re in Southern California because I love to have in house guests, email me at Julie: @Julie pearson.org. and I will get you in the calendar.
Jamila Jackson 06:16
Julie Pearson 06:17
Intermission there, right? So, Jamila, I’m excited that you’re here, when I read your story on your website. I mean, a mother, a woman who is a mom, I felt your pain.
Jamila Jackson 06:29
Julie Pearson 06:31
I felt your pain. And so why don’t you just give a little introduction of yourself and maybe why you’re excited to be here?
Jamila Jackson 06:36
Sure! Well, I’m super excited to be here, first of all, because I believe that everything that you’re doing, with a revival for women, truly is aligned with the same mission that I have with loved and blessed. I think that there are so many things that can be really discouraging for women today. And so I think to be able to give that encouragement, and hope and just renewal every single day is so important. And it’s something that honestly we take for granted. And I know I took it for granted a lot before and kind of ever starting this whole journey with loved and blessed.
Julie Pearson 07:06
Yeah, yeah, yeah, that’s good. I’ve got these pretty pink little boxes. We’re going to be talking about this, these pretty pink boxes here in just a minute. So will you are the founder of love and blessed. And your tagline I love on your website of your ministry says that: he’s turned my misery into my ministry.
Jamila Jackson 07:28
Julie Pearson 07:29
I love that that pops. Please like, give our audience just a really quick kind of overall picture of your story that was filled with a lot of misery and broken dreams.
Jamila Jackson 07:39
Yeah, I mean, I think it’s really interesting. A lot of times I talked to people and they asked, how I started out with this kind of ministry and business and I said, Well it wasn’t really purposeful. It was one of those things that kind of came out of my own personal pain. And so, I guess the short version of the story is that I was working and really happy; working in product development and design and, had just gotten married and I was really, really excited about starting a family, and about three years into being married we said, okay, it’s about time to get started.
Julie Pearson 8:15
The funny part of it.
Jamila Pearson 08:17
Right, exactly the fun part.
Julie Pearson 08:18
That’s what the husbands like.
Jamila Jackson 08:19
Right! [Laughing].Yes, we did enjoy the trying.
Jamila Jackson 08:22
I’m still trying. We started trying, having fun, but then we realized that we were about a year and a half into trying officially and nothing was happening. And I started to get a little nervous, but I had a lot of friends that said, just be patient, things take time, you never know. So we went through kind of all of the motions and doctor’s appointments and things like that and found out that my husband was fine, but that there were some issues with me physically, that would cause it to be extremely, extremely unlikely that without a miracle that I would become pregnant naturally. And so after a lot of prayers and talking to a lot of family friends and just trying to figure out okay, what are our next steps?
Do we want to adopt? Do we want to try other means? And so we ended up trying IVF, and for anybody who’s been through in vitro fertilization, that’s a whole other emotional journey on its own. And so, you know, that was actually really, really tough and at the same time, we were super excited because, in one of our attempts, we actually did get pregnant. And so I was pregnant for precious nine weeks and ended up having a miscarriage and, that was really hard to because there’s a lot that goes into that but, you know. I guess I’ll just say that, for me that nine weeks was still really special for me, and it’s still something that makes me smile to think about even though the pain of actually going through that miscarriage physically and emotionally.
And so, I remember literally on the floor as the miscarriage was happening, just praying and asking God like what is your will? I just want your will, not mine, like what’s happening right now. Because I just knew, as soon as the doctor initially told us that we were pregnant, I just knew that our miracle had happened.
Julie Pearson 10:14
Your dream had come alive!
Yeah, exactly! And so, being in that place of like, wait a minute, I thought, we had prayed about this, and we really felt what we’re supposed to do, and then having that kind of torn away, was really hard. And so, out of that, again, long story short, but out of that, is: I got into a season of where I just started praying and fasting because I really didn’t understand what my life was supposed to be about if motherhood wasn’t what God had for me. And that was a really hard realization to come to, of kind of like, well, what if that isn’t what is in his will for me, specifically?
And so it was in that season that he literally deposited this idea of boxes of encouragement in my spirit, and it’s the weirdest thing because people are like, that’s really weird. And I’m like, yeah, it was very weird. Like, that’s just what popped into my brain was boxes of encouragement. And I didn’t really know what that meant, but after praying about it for a few more days, I started to realize that a lot of the talents and gifts he has given me that I was using in the secular world could be used to actually create things to encourage women that had more eternal value.
And so I started really small, just you know, sending boxes and making things and sending them to just people out of the blue and friends and family and just gifting them to people. And eventually, it grew into a whole ministry and small business that it is now where we send boxes every single month, women become members, and we have an online community where they can really share what’s going on in their hearts, and the challenges that they’re facing in all areas of life. And then we have videos in the boxes kind of go along with each month’s theme and so that’s kind of where love and blessed was born.
Julie Pearson 11:48
That’s so awesome. And there are probably, I mean, there are probably a lot of women that you’re touching because this is such a trend I think today is the infertility issue.
Jamila Jackson 12:00
Julie Pearson 12:01
And It’s like, why God? I’m sure that you went through all of those emotions of this biggest dream that you had of being a mom.
Jamila Jackson 12:10
Julie Pearson 12:11
That was the biggest area that you thought you would be fulfilled.
Jamila Jackson 12:15
Julie Pearson 12:17
Was being a mom and then it didn’t happen and so I could just imagine the thought and the emotions coming behind that you saw a light at the end of the tunnel, you saw that God kind of was like fulfilling this dream.
Jamila Jackson 12:35
Julie Pearson 12:36
How long did it take for you guys to get pregnant?
Jamila Jackson 12:38
Let’s see, we actually were pregnant on the first round of IVF.
Julie Pearson 12:44
Jamila Jackson 12:45
And then we tried three more times after that, but the first one was the only time that I got pregnant and then I had a miscarriage. Yeah.
Julie Pearson 12:52
Yeah o gosh! So what was going through your mind during this stage? I’m sure that you became angry with God.
Jamila Jackson 13:00
Julie Pearson 13:01
Let’s talk through that because that is a real emotion that we all as women can relate to that when things don’t seem to go according to our dreams, and plans, and our wants and our desires, and it doesn’t just happen once that over and over and over again.
Jamila Jackson 13:18
Julie Jackson 13:19
And you don’t see hope in the formation of the dream, anger is such a natural emotion. Share about kind of how that took light in your life?
Jamila Jackson 13:30
Yeah, I think, for me, it took me a while to realize I was actually angry. My initial reaction, of course, was a disappointment, and depression, and I was just really upset and I was questioning whether or not I heard God right. Did we make the right decision and even attempting IVF because, you know, and all of that? And it took me a while to realize that I was actually angry with God. I had gotten to a point where my study time was, my Bible studies time in the mornings was focused on only the stories out of the Bible that were about infertility.
Julie Pearson 14:09
Anna and Sarah.
Jamila Jackson 14:10
Exactly, you know reading and rereading that just for encouragement, all the stuff. And I kept saying, like, I don’t understand, you put me through all of this and now here’s where I am. And especially when it got to the point of we decided to use all of our embryos, because we didn’t want to destroy anything. And even the ones that the doctor told us, these aren’t going to work, we were like, well just put them in any way, that’s what we’re going to do.
And so it was a really hopeless time for a few years actually. And it took me a while to realize that I was really angry that my dream had been kind of taken away from me. I was angry that the people around me who were trying to encourage me, in some ways were actually making me feel worse.
Julie Pearson 14:53
Why is that?
Jamila Jackson 14:52
It was not it wasn’t intentional. It was one of those things; I think it’s something that we do a lot of times as Christian. As Christians, we pull out specific verses.
Julie Pearson 15:00
Jamila Jackson 15:01
Julie Pearson 15:03
Jamila Jackson 15:04
And we divorce the verse from God’s will, right? And so you know the verses about, God giving you the desires of your heart and things like that. And so those things were quoted to me a lot as encouragement from other Christian women who I respect and love. They weren’t doing it purposely, but it got me into this place of being angry, even angrier because I was kind of like, well, but I’m a woman, I’m married. God’s will is for me to have children; we’re supposed to be fruitful and multiply and like all of these things in my head were kind of really building up. And so I had to actually look at where I was being selfish, in my desire to be a mother, where I was so focused on that and it had really become an idol in my life of where I was so focused on motherhood, that I couldn’t see anything else. And so I actually had to pray multiple times and ask for forgiveness from God for me holding on to this anger that he didn’t give me what I wanted and asking him what he wanted instead.
Julie Pearson 16:02
You brought up some good stuff there because there are a lot of those verses in the Bible that says God gives you the desires of your heart and when you are in the thick in the mud of a dream not being broken, not coming to life, a situation a circumstance being really hard.
Jamila Jackson 16:21
Julie Pearson 16:22
And then you hear these verses in the Bible, It is a natural reaction to go I don’t believe that, like how could that be written? He’s not giving and he still hasn’t given you the desires of your heart.
Jamila Jackson 16:34
Julie Pearson 16:35
So that is some tough emotions to wrestle with.
Jamila Jackson 16:51
Julie Pearson 16:52
But I think you’re absolutely right. In fact, let me ask you before we get to the whole Idol thing.
Jamila Jackson 16:59
Julie Pearson 17:00
Is it okay to be angry with God? Because I think a lot of us as Christians we get scared if we’re angry with God, then he’s going to put more of a curse on us, right?
Jamila Jackson 17:10
Yeah, well, and it’s so funny, I actually talked to people about this a lot, because, in every situation, whether it’s infertility or for some people, it’s when their marriage falls apart or something happens to their child, or there’s a death in the family or; even just with the world today, everything that’s going on.
There are so many things that a lot of times we’re angry with God about because we don’t understand why he’s letting them happen. But I laugh at myself because it’s not okay to be angry with God to answer your question, but it’s normal. I think it’s a natural thing that we all feel, but the question is, are we willing to actually acknowledge it? Because he already knows we’re angry and I think that’s the part that I laugh about. It’s like, God knows I’m mad, he knew I was mad before I realized I was mad at him. I’m huffing and puffing and thinking, I’m doing all these things, but I’m spending less and less time in prayer because I don’t think that he’s going to answer it or I’m scared of the answer that he’s going to give me, right?
A lot of times we go to prayers so many assuming the answer is going to be yes, but the answer sometimes is no, or sometimes it’s wait, or sometimes it’s yes, but in a different way than what you think it’s going to be. And so yeah, I think being angry with God is very normal. The bad part is when we don’t actually acknowledge it and say like, Lord, I’m angry with you, please help me to understand what you’re doing.
Julie Pearson 18:29
That’s really good. I think that’s what’s healthy about it, acknowledging it and letting God know, I’m angry. I’ve had to do that on my own.
Jamila Jackson 18:40
Julie Pearson 18:41
Just recently, I’m done, I’m angry at you. And sometimes I think it’s okay to put an ultimatum out there.
Jamila Jackson 18:46
Julie Pearson 18:48
I had to do that, like recently too. I need you to show me if I’m on the wrong path.
Jamila Jackson 18:55
Julie Pearson 18:56
And you know what, God is so faithful.
Jamila Jackson 18:58
Julie Pearson 18:59
When we put those ultimatums in front of it, he does show us.
Jamila Jackson 19:01
Julie Pearson 19:03
The people or circumstance, but you know; going back to this anger thing too, let’s look at Jesus’s life. There is such a thing as righteous anger.
Jamila Jackson 19:13
Julie Pearson 19:15
Right. And Jesus got to a place where he had righteous anger in the temple
Jamila Jackson 19:20
Julie Pearson 19:22
And so sat in on a lot of times our anger is maybe an injustice that’s happening in the world. And righteous anger is good because that’s when we begin to see God.
Jamila Jackson 19:32
Julie Pearson 19:33
Right? And so, I could imagine that some of your anger was righteous anger because you are you’re at this place of okay, this is not happening.
Jamila Pearson 19:44
Julie Pearson 19:45
Show me why? And it’s not blaming.
Jamila Jackson 19:47
Julie Pearson 19:49
But I think those are the good questions to really ask when we’re going through a time of broken dreams.
Jamila Jackson 19:54
Yeah. Well, if you think about Job; I think about Job a lot and it’s like, there were so many things that he had like you’re saying, in a sense of right to be angry about to a certain extent, right? like, his family died, his livelihood is taken away. He’s sick and he’s got, diseases and like, all these things have happened to him. And at the same time, then God’s like, but I created everything. You don’t think that I am in control?
And I think that that humility is one of the things that came out of my whole infertility journey. That humility of realizing like, Okay, I have a right to be upset, like that’s its normal that I want to be a mother. It’s not like some crazy dream like it’s a normal thing, as a woman to want to be a mom, so it’s okay for me to be upset, but at the same time, I have to realize that the world does not revolve around me.
Julie Pearson 20:44
Jamila Jackson 20:45
And so even though it feels like it does when you’re in your own pain, there are so many other things that God has that he wants me to do, that I know for a fact would not have happened if he had allowed me to actually have children when I wanted to. And that’s a hard pill to swallow, but there’s the humility in that of realizing like I’m actually in some ways as crazy as it sounds grateful. That desire is still there, but I have more of a desire to do His will than to worry as much. I’m okay if he doesn’t grant my wish to be a mother at some point.
Julie Pearson 21:21
Jamila Jackson 21:22
Right. Yeah, Let’s talk about, I think that some sometimes so true, why we kind of go through these periods of broken dreams is God’s trying to take us to a humble place. And he does it differently in all of our lives, so no matter what we’re going through, a lot of it is to come down to this place of, God’s trying to show us that, he wants us to make sure that he’s kind of the guide in our lives and we’re not led through our own selfish desires, right? So you talked about this admitting that this desire of being a mother making him an idol. How can the desire of motherhood be an idol?
Jamila Jackson 21:59
I know, I say that sometimes people are like, Wait, what? Because we normally think of idols as something that most people would shake or nod and say, that’s a bad thing in your life.
Jamila Jackson 22:09
You shouldn’t be idolizing that. I think for me, I realized that motherhood had taken over everything- my desire to be a mother had taken over everything. As I said, if I’m honest there’s probably like a year and a half, if not longer, where I probably did not study anything out of the Bible that didn’t have to do with my own pain.
Julie Pearson 22:30
Jamila Jackson 22:32
Not that Bible studies ever bad, but when it gets to the point where I’m searching for things to justify my pain, or to only make me feel better, and I’m not really trying to grow in my relationship, that’s not a healthy thing, in my opinion. I got to the point where, initially when this had all started, I was working full time for another company and designing things. I used to travel all around the world and work with factories, and designers and manufacturers in different countries. And I would schedule my trips around when I was ovulating and to the detriments at times of other things. It had gotten to the point where there were things in my marriage that were hard because that’s where I was focused. I was just on getting pregnant, getting pregnant.
I was working in an industry where we would develop a lot of things and a lot of products and I had before we ever even tried to actually before I ever got married, I had boxes and boxes of baby clothes.
Jamila Jackson 23:31
And samples that we had made for different companies. I used to work in a company that we did baby apparel, so I had little onesies and little hats, little socks, saving all of these things. And so when we first got married, it was really funny. My husband and I were unpacking things, my husband was like, why do you these boxes, of baby clothes?
Julie Pearson 23:51
Because you were never going to use them.
Jamila Jackson 23:53
Yeah, exactly. It’s like, ah, but everything in my life revolved around wanting to get pregnant. As soon as we got married, I stopped buying shoes because I had heard that people’s shoe size changes when you get pregnant. I was like, Oh no, I don’t want that, so I’m not going to buy any shoes, just to the point of it being pretty ridiculous. And so, it really did become where my life revolved around that and I think anytime your life begins to revolve around one thing and it’s more about what you want, you do get to that selfish place and I think anything even good things can become idols in your life
Julie Pearson 24:27
Yes, that’s so true. I think sometimes when things become all too consuming, they become all too controlling.
Jamila Jackson 24:33
Julie Pearson 24:36
Yes, so as hard as that is to look at motherhood as an idol, now I can see through your explanation, that if you’re just constantly consumed by his thought and this idea, it’s controlling.
Jamila Jackson 24:48
Julie Pearson 24:50
God spoke to me this morning, even on the way here of like, Julie, once you let go of that, then it’s going to start to happen.
Jamila Jackson 24:56
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Julie Pearson 25:00
But I’m so consumed by a thought right now, an issue and it’s like, as soon as I stopped being consumed by that, and then it’s going to happen.
Jamila Jackson 25:09
Julie Pearson 25:10
It’s going to happen in the way God wants it to happen, not the way I want it.
Jamila Jackson 25:16
Julie Pearson 25:16
But I think that is the whole lesson to be learned here is that sometimes our broken dreams are the result of our idol.
Jamila Jackson 25:28
Julie Pearson 25:30
That’s some hard stuff to look at.
Jamila Jackson 25:33
Julie Pearson 25:34
It is self-reflection right there, right?
Jamila Jackson 25:38
Yeah, it really is.
Julie Pearson 25:40
Yeah, and that’s where God does his best work though. One thing I’ve been asking God is, are my desires, your desires, right? I think God wants us to be in a place like that, asking those questions. God, I have this desire.
Jamila Jackson 25:56
Julie Pearson 25:56
And that’s something I’ve learned too, It’s like I have this desire, God but I don’t know if it’s my desire or your desire? And what a great place to be, the humility that you’re about when we can come to that place of just complete, if okay, not my will.
Jamila Jackson 26:16
Julie Pearson 26:17
But your will!
Jamila Jackson 26:18
Juliet Pearson 26:19
There’s freedom in that, isn’t it?
Jamila Jackson 26:20
There is, there is.
Juliet Pearson 26:22
How have you been able to really feel freedom in that?
Jamila Jackson 26:25
Yeah! I think for me, it’s just what you said, It’s like that letting go. And I think as hard as it was to say, not my will, but yours, Lord, at the same time it’s interesting, because, I do believe that God is fulfilling the desires of my heart, but he’s pulling out different desires that I didn’t were there. And so yes, that kind of all-encompassing obsession with becoming a mother is and was still a desire that I have, but at the same time, it’s like that has gone to the point where, as I said, I’m okay. Because there was a point in my life where I felt like I wasn’t going to be okay if that didn’t happen and I really just felt lost.
Juliet Pearson 27:05
Like you had to find you?
Jamila Jackson 27:06
Yeah. Like, what is my life for?
Julie Pearson 27:08
What is your purpose?
Jamila Jackson 27:09
Julie Pearson 27:10
That’s good. I think that’s a big question women ask all the time.
Absolutely! Yeah and especially with something as dear as motherhood, and I’ve talked to friends who also like are beyond motherhood, who are just still in a singleness phase and want to be married, and that’s the desire of their heart. I have a friend who’s bought her wedding dress already, I won’t mention her name. I was talking to her about, like, being careful of that not becoming such an idol, and all-consuming; because yes, it’s a good thing and yes, it’s kind of a weird thing to talk about marriage as becoming an idol.
I know when I was in my mid to late 20s, I started to kind of freak out and had that same issue of, oh my gosh, am I ever going to get married?
Julie Pearson 27:51
Jamila Jackson 27:52
What if God has something else for us? And so he is able to really restore those broken dreams, but I think that we have to be willing to let go. You don’t have to completely let go, but at least open your hand. I was holding on to motherhood some and just clutching it.
Julie Pearson 28:12
Yeah. Because you’re not like you want to let go with that completely.
Jamila Jackson 28:14
Exactly! So it’s like that dream is still there, but I had to actually open my hand and say, alright Lord, if you want to take it out of my hand, you can, but also, if you want to put something else there, I am open to that too.
Julie Pearson 28:25
That’s good, what a wonderful illustration; open-ended enough to say, I’m giving it to you.
Jamila Jackson 28:31
Julie Pearson 28:32
If there’s something else you want for me, place it in my hand. Yeah, that’s a beautiful Visual right there.
Yeah. And I think that’s for me, that’s what ended up with this ministry, I never would have thought of this if I hadn’t gone through that pain.
Julie Pearson 28:48
Yeah, yeah. Wow, Wow! So, we’re still on the subject of kind of idols and God bringing us down in our idols. Why does God seem to do his best work and his refining, In the areas that maybe we’ve created the idols?
Jamila Jackson 29:12
Yeah. Honestly, I think it’s because those are the places where he’s going to really, really get at us. I feel like there are a lot of little things looking back, right 2020 hindsight, it’s always easier to see certain things. And I can see certain things were I remember being at my job and getting to the point where I was getting promotions and raises and things not because I was necessarily going after them, but they were just coming because hopefully, I was doing a good job. But it was interesting because I never felt like I really wanted them and I remember it being weird talking to co-workers that would be super excited for me and I was kind of like, yes, yeah great; and they’re like, aren’t you excited? I could never really explain why that was.
Julie Pearson 29:57
Looking back on it now, I’m like, all right, Lord, I can see why you were kind of tempering that excitement in my heart because you had something else for me, but I couldn’t see it. And again, at that time, I was so focused on becoming a mother that it was kind of like, Okay, well, my job was amazing, the company I worked for is amazing. They had great maternity leave, policy and so I was really focused on that. And I think that God had to prick me in a place where he knew it was going to hurt the most, because he loves me, not because he wanted to hurt me, but because without that, I would never have stopped. It’s like he had to literally rip it away in order for me to stop and pay attention because he had tried to do other things, it wasn’t enough for me to stop and pay attention.
Julie Pearson 30:43
You know, I love it; you just kind of talked about that. Do you sometimes kind of go, Okay, I’m not going to want to be a mother because of what you were talking about related to your job versus motherhood, it’s so true. It’s like oh my gosh, I can eat this up because I see this so true in my own life; it is like the things that I want so bad in my life are the things that are the hardest to get!
Jamila Jackson 31:04
Julie Pearson 31:06
If things that were like, ah that doesn’t matter, it’s easy.
Julie Pearson 31:10
It just becomes easy, right?
Jamila Jackson 31:11
Julie Pearson 31:12
So what you need to do to minimize your scope? I don’t like kids, I don’t want kids.
Jamila Jackson 31:16
And then the opposite will happen.
Julie Pearson 31:17
They say too, a lot of women have so much trouble getting pregnant because they’re so stressed about it.
Jamila Jackson 31:23
Julie Pearson 31:25
And that’s a big cause of infertility too.
Jamila Jackson 31:25
Julie Pearson 31:27
Man, our psyche! The way God created us, he just knows us so well.
Jamila Jackson 31:32
Julie Pearson 31:33
It’s tough in those areas where we want so bad, we want so badly.
Jamila Jackson 31:40
Julie Pearson 31:41
It doesn’t allow us to be at ease.
Jamila Jackson 31:42
Yes, exactly. It doesn’t allow us to be at ease and it doesn’t allow us to actually have a clear picture of what he’s trying to do.
Julie Pearson 31:52
Yeah, yeah. Wow! Well, before we go to our break, let’s tackle one more question; how would you kind of tackle this truth that God is in our broken dreams? I love the verse that you shared on your website, Romans 12: 12. How Did you ultimately believe that God was becoming in your broken dreams?
Jamila Jackson 32:16
Well, I always loved that little phrase that you see, choose joy, right? You see everybody, but I’ve always kind of question okay, but how do you do that, right? Especially in a season where you are in a broken dream season or where you feel like a dream is starting to fall away and you’re not sure what’s happening. How do you continue to choose joy because it sounds great, but it’s not practical necessarily in real life? And so for me in that season of trying to figure out like, what do you want me to do, Lord, if motherhood isn’t what you have, for me? Romans 12:12 was the scripture that really resonated with me.
Julie Pearson 32:49
Do you have it right there?
Jamila Jackson 32:50
Yeah, actually it’s, be joyful and hope and patient in affliction and faithful in prayer. And for me, that is how you choose joy, right? Is that no matter what’s happening around you, if you’re patient through the affliction if you’re patient through that trial, and through that season; if you choose to focus on the hope that gives you joy. And if you’re faithful in prayer throughout it, that’s how you get through those seasons of affliction. So for me, that’s super simple. I mean, it’s like a short super short verse, but that for me is how you choose joy and as I said that for me, that’s really the basis of everything that I try to do is to help people to do that every single day, similar to what you’re doing with revival.
Julie Pearson 33:29
Yeah. I love that short and sweet verse, let me read it again.
Jamila Jackson 33:37
Julie Pearson 33:39
We’re going to read it again; “be joyful and hope, patient in affliction and faithful in prayer”; the three keywords joyful, patient and faithful. That’s the keys to life, learning how to be faithful in our affliction.
Jamila Jackson 33:56
Julie Pearson 33:56
Be faithful when God isn’t blessing us in the areas that we still want to be blessed in. How hard though, be faithful in the sickness.
Jamila Jackson 34:10
How do you be faithful in that sickness? Life is so hard, that’s why heaven is going to be a glorious place.
Jamila Jackson 34:17
Julie Pearson 34:18
We don’t have to deal with all these issues, right? We all have it and that’s the thing about what you’re doing. I love your boxes of encouragement and ministries. It’s like, God knew that we needed to have ministries like this on earth because he knows how tough and how hard this earth living this life is going to be because sin entered the world.
Jamila Jackson 34:40
Julie Pearson 34:41
So it’s automatic, but gosh, having that eternal perspective, that hope of You know what, someday, this will this to will pass.
Jamila Jackson 34:50
Yes, it will.
Julie Pearson 34:52
It will, right? It’s learning how to live in the midst of things.
Jamila Jackson 34:54
Julie Pearson 34:55
Well, let’s take a quick break. Before we come back, we’re going to take 30 seconds out to advertise our sponsor for the revived podcast which is Esther rising. We are speaking with Jamila Jackson, founder of loved and blessed and she shares her story about how she had a lot of misery in her dream of being a mother, but God created a ministry out of her misery. We’ll be right back.
Unknown Speaker 35:13
Esther rising is a sponsor for revive radio. She is a former wife of a National Football League player. Esther rising is a member of women of the NFL, and she resides in Nashville, Tennessee. It’s not all roses is her first published book. It’s a story of her journey of a high profile broken, abused and troubled marriage to regaining her God-given identity and keeping it sacred for life. The lessons learned made her a teacher, a minister in intercessor, and an advocate for marriages. It’s not all roses is available on xulon press.com, Amazon. com and Kindle websites. For dialogue and speaking engagements, you can contact Esther rising on Facebook and Esther rising on twitter at Where’s Esther or by phone at 6154181280.
Julie Pearson 36:17
Aright, we are back in the studio with Jamila Jackson. Thank you to our sponsor Esther rising for sponsoring the revived podcasts. Ester rising, you are helping keep to keep this podcast alive. Any of you who do want to sponsor, add or come on to our sponsorship program, please get in touch with me, I’d love to talk to you. Email me at Julie @juliepearson.org.
Well, I love all of the people on our Facebook feed right now who are live listening. Thank you so much Kelly’s who is watching, Kelly Dixon, John Knipper, Phyllis Davis and she wrote, he never closed one door without opening another, trust and believe which is so so true. Thank you, Phyllis, for that comment. And so for those of you who are listening right now on Facebook, please engage with us, make a comment, ask a question. Jamila is going to give away one of her boxes today to someone who is in our live audience and engaging with us, so don’t be shy.
Alright, so we are back with Jamila and talking about her story of just a broken dream of her not being a mother fulfilled right now in her life, but one day, I know that that dream is gonna come true for you.
So why is it important, I guess for us to recognize and acknowledge that God sees our misery in our broken dreams? Can you really say that right now, Jamila as you process your pain, it takes time to process our pain, right?
Jamila Jackson 37:43
Julie Pearson 37:44
And it’s still hard, I’m sure when you see little babies and your heart goes like ah, that desire is so strong.
Jamila Jackson 37:52
Julie Pearson 37:53
But now you’re at a place where maybe you’re not mad, and angry.
Jamila Jackson 37:57
Julie Pearson 37:59
But you’re waiting patiently.
Jamila Jackson 38:01
Julie Pearson 38:02
And so why is it important for us to get to this stage of acknowledging God’s in this, God is in this mystery of mine right now?
Jamila Jackson 38:09
Julie Pearson 38:10
God is in this heartbreak of this broken dream of mine.
Jamila Jackson 38:12
Yeah. I think that for anybody who’s experienced any sort of broken dream, as you said, there’s always still that glimmer of hope, right? And again, we were just talking about Romans 12:12. I think it’s important to always have that hope because we have no idea what God’s going to do next, right? We might think we know, we might think we have a plan. I’m a planner too, so it makes it even harder when my plan doesn’t work outright.
I think that the importance and recognizing that God is in our broken places honestly, that gives us hope, right? If we don’t recognize that God is in our pain, as much as in our joys, then I think a lot of times we kind of steal the glory that he can get from what he’s doing. So we’re talking about humility, and me realizing that out of my pain, other great things have been able to happen. And if I didn’t recognize what he was trying to do, and I kept fighting against it, and just focusing on what I wanted, then there are so many other blessings that never would have happened and honestly, I would have been stealing joy from somebody else. I think the more that we can recognize that there’s a purpose in our pain, as hard as that is to accept it, it’s hard to hear somebody tell you that when you’re in it.
Julie Pearson 39:36
It’s a cliché’.
Jamila Jackson 39:38
It is cliché and at the same time, it’s so true, but a lot of times, I’ll encourage people to actually look back over their lives and it makes it a little easier to realize that even if I can’t figure out what the purpose is right now, and even though I’m angry about it right now, I can probably think of three or four times in my life before where I’ve been that angry, where I felt like a different dream was broken, or ripped away. We’re now looking back on it, I’m like, Oh, I see what he was doing. I kind of laugh at myself, like alright, Lord, I’m going to trust you right now, even though I have no idea what you’re doing right now. You figured out those other things that had a purpose, even if the purpose wasn’t about me, and it was about somebody else. So I’m going to trust you even in this even though I don’t understand what’s happening.
Julie Pearson 40:19
Yea, yeah, wow! And you know that the verse that I kind of went to with this question was first Peter 5: 7.
Jamila Jackson 40:29
Julie Pearson 40:30
Which is, “cast your cares upon Him” and He cares for you.
Jamila Jackson 40:33
Julie Pearson 40:34
How can that verse really come alive to a woman who’s listening right now? Yeah, right. Does God care for me? Like she doubts, that God, he sees you, he loves you and he adores you; he cares for you. What’s your advice on, how is that true?
Jamila Jackson 40:53
So again, just using my own personal story; for me, it’s been a process of realizing that, this is going sound a little crazy, so hold on to your seat. He used my miscarriage as a way to draw me closer to him. And I can see that now is him caring for me, because honestly if I had a child when we were initially trying, I really don’t think my relationship with him would be as strong as it is now. And so in a weird way, he had to cause that pain because he loves me and because he wanted me to be closer to him. And again, that’s a really hard thing to accept. And it’s hard because sometimes people look at that and say, oh, but that’s not a good God, like, why would God do that? But there are so many good things that still come out of those painful moments.
I think that when we do cast our cares on him and when we do, as I was saying earlier, open our hands and just say, God, what do you want to put in my hands? You’re taking something away from me, but what is it that you want to In my hands? We’re also in a position of having more gratitude for the things that he has given us, because I can look at my life and say, we don’t have children right now, or this is sort of TMI, but you’ll probably find this funny.
I had a panic a few months ago because I had some things going on with me physically. And I thought I was going into early menopause. And so of course, I that whole brought up a whole other thing of like, Okay, well, when that hits, it’s really done. And so, I had to really deal with some of the things that I had kind of gotten past and in accepting the status of my fertility at the moment; but I realized that even in those moments, it’s like, he’s drawing me closer and closer to him because he cares for me, and the strength that he’s given me through this journey has made so many other things in my life bearable.
Julie Pearson 43:03
Jamila Jackson 43:04
And again, if I hadn’t gone through what I’ve gone through, I wouldn’t have the strength to handle some of those other things that have gone on in my life because infertility is just one of my testimonies. But like so many women have so many other testimonies and men too. We have had so many other testimonies of tough, broken things that have happened in our lives.
Julie Pearson 43:23
Yeah, I feel like that’s the great divide, where some of us are able to kind of pull up our bootstraps and go, Okay, I’m going to trust that he still cares for me.
Jamila Jackson 43:34
Julie Pearson 43:35
But there’s the other side that’s so sad, where maybe there’s been a lot of hurts.
Jamila Jackson 43:41
Julie Pearson 43:42
In their life, and a lot of anger has built up and so the immediate reaction is just a scope. I can’t trust that you care for me God and so we run away from God; and it’s like, oh, if that is you out there today. I don’t know where it’s going to take maybe, you know, what I would say is read a psalm. Read a Psalm a day, read something that’s going to draw your heart closer and see a glimpse of him. I mean, that’s the secret of life is just figuring out finding some sort of glimpse that he created you and that he does care for you. No matter how much hurt and pain, you know when people say that all the time and I see women up there preaching and teaching and I’m like, they’ve had so much success, how can they?
Jamila Jackson 44:30
Julie Pearson 44:31
It’s so easy to kind of categorize people when they say things like that.
Jamila Jackson 44:40
And I think that why one encouragement that I would give women and I say this and sometimes it takes a while to really get comfortable with it but is to stop suffering in silence.
Julie Pearson 44:52
Stop suffering in silence, take that.
Jamila Jackson 44:54
Julie Pearson 44:55
That is for someone here today, stop suffering in silence.
Jamila Jackson 44:59
Yeah, because I think that for me, the biggest thing that I’ve learned out of my pain is that my transparency about it, and my honesty about it actually brings me more encouragement. I tell people all the time like, you can Get encouragement if you don’t tell anybody what’s going on, and they don’t even know that you need anything like that, you’re in pain and sometimes it’s okay. Sometimes we’re scared to share our pain because we feel ashamed.
I know in my struggles there were a lot of kind of shame feelings that came along with it. Until I actually was okay with sharing, like, this is what I’m going through, this is how I feel about it. I am angry at God, I am feeling this way. I do regret focusing so much of these years, certain years of my life on trying to get pregnant and while other things were going on around me that I just kind of blocked out because that’s all I was focused on. Like being able, to be honest about it, I get so much encouragement from that because other women who have experienced that or have experienced other things but can relate, we can share our stories and encourage each other. And it’s okay to say like, I don’t have the answer to why this is happening to you, but I do trust God and I want to help you trust him too even through this. And so we can pray together or talk to each other or just text each other scripture or something funny to laugh or whatever.
And so I would just encourage anyone who’s listening who is going through something right now whatever it is, that your transparency is actually your strength. A lot of times we think of that as a weakness because we don’t want to tell people what’s going on. But I found so much strength in that and of course, I’m not advocating for you to post it all over social media necessarily, because some of us are a little too transparent. But I think to find safe people and community around you, where you can share those things, and be met with encouragement and sometimes tough love. I had people who would look at me and my husband for one who got to a point even in our husbands IVF[cross talking]
Julie Pearson 46:59
He gives me that all the time.
Jamila Jackson 47:01
Yeah, you know, and that conversation of my husband started with me of like, Okay, after this, we are going to use these embryos. If this does not work, what are we doing because our life can’t revolve around this? Not that we don’t want to have children, but we’re getting to a point where that’s the focus. And so you know that tough love was really hard to hear, but I needed it. And so I think having people in your life that can do that for you is actually really important, so that’s what I would encourage women to do is to just be transparent.
Julie Pearson 47:28
You know, you brought up this word shame and I am so happy that God is using you. Have you heard of Renee Brown?
Jamila Jackson 47:36
Yes, I love her.
Juliet Pearson 47:38
Yeah, she is like the shame expert. She is kind of initiated; she was kind of the commissioner. We got to talk about her shame, because if we don’t learn how to talk about it, and we’re just going to completely die.
Jamila Jackson 47:49
Julie Pearson 47:50
And so, but it’s interesting, because when I hear your story, I’m like, no, I wouldn’t feel like there’s a shame behind not being able to have a child, you know, but for some women, that’s a deep shame. Our shame stems from the root of something.
Jamila Jackson 48:06
Julie Pearson 48:09
My same is different. Yeah, and my identity is my shame.
Jamila Jackson 48:15
Exactly! Well, I think that actually mine is related to my identity. I think for me, as I was saying, the infertility was kind of the misery that love and bless came out of, but there’s so much leading up to that and we all have so many different testimonies in our lives. I think for me, I know we’re on the radio, some of you guys are watching live, but as a black woman, I grew up in mostly predominantly white neighbourhoods, and so there were adjustments and challenges that came with that. I think for me getting married, I was 30 when I got married, which these days Isn’t that old, but you know, for a lot of us by the time I hit 25, I was starting to freak out. So, for a lot of us women that feels old, and so there were a lot of different things in my life that I had been made to feel ashamed about. I was I grew up in the south and so I used to have a very weird Southern accent.
Juliet Pearson 49:16
I can still hear it a little bit, I love Southern accent.
Jamila Jackson 49:20
I do too.
Julie Pearson 49:21
I just love it.
Jamila Jackson 49:22
When we moved to California I got made fun of for that, so you know, and I always felt very left out because I didn’t really fit in with my community and then I also didn’t necessarily fit in. The churches that I grew up going to were usually predominately black churches and I felt kind of left out there because I didn’t really have the same life experiences that some of my friends. So I always felt left out and not like I didn’t fit in, and so there was a shame that went along with that and then when infertility hit it was interesting because it actually even though those seem not related, it made me feel left out as a woman.
Julie Pearson 49:58
Yeah, I was just going to say, that whole feeling of being left out.
Jamila Jackson 50:00
Exactly. And so there were very well-meaning friends who I am very close to and I love to death, but that didn’t invite me to their baby showers during that time, because they thought it was going to hurt my feelings. And I would find out about the baby shower later, and my feelings were worse.
Julie Pearson 50:15
You know, because I felt ashamed. There were so many things that that just compounded and so it made me feel even more left out and so it tapped into that identity we were talking about of like, I’ve never felt like I quite fit in in the right places, or, like, it was okay for me to just be me my quirky self, and not fit into a certain category and so then, not being a mother and then also having a fairly successful career. The assumption was always made that that’s why I wasn’t a mother. People wouldn’t ask, they would say like, Oh, you know, the first question, people ask you are you married? Do you have kids? And I would say, I’m married, no, I don’t have kids. And even now, I’ve been married for 14 years and so with people, there’s like the silence when they say, do you have kids? And I’m like, oh, no, and they’re like, but haven’t you been married for a long time? And I’m like, yeah.
Julie Pearson 51:00
That’s the stigma; yeah, yeah, yeah.
Jamila Jackson 51:03
So there’s a lot of shame that comes up.
Julie Pearson 51:07
Yeah, have you guys thought about adopting?
Jamila Jackson 51:08
We have, and it’s interesting because we’ve talked about adopting and fostering.
Julie Pearson 51:12
Jamila Jackson 51:13
And it was interesting; we talked about it in that season right after we had tried IVF. We mourned for a while.
Julie Pearson 51:20
Jamila Jackson 51:21
And then we talked about that and then it was in that season when this whole thing started with loved and blessed, and it’s been crazy. My husband’s also an entrepreneur. So it’s been crazy, kind of that’s been our trajectory. And so at this point, we’re still prayerful about it, but we just haven’t quite felt like the timing has been right. And I think that’s an interesting thing that links back to the shame thing too because there are times where I get into conversations and people; how do I put this? They kind of inadvertently make you feel bad for not adopting right away and it’s a weird thing. It’s a hard thing to talk about because I still feel like everything that we do, has to be God-led, and I think that if we had initially jumped directly into it which honestly, I wanted to do pretty right away.
I had brochures and was downloading stuff and my husband was kind of like, Okay, calm down, like we’re still in this acceptance phase before you jump right into the next thing. And so, you know, I had started downloading brochures and all this stuff and was really like researching adoption. And it was interesting because that shame thing came up again when I started looking at like, Oh, you have to do these interviews and write these things about why I would be a good parent and you know about the whole process. It’s a great process, but as a person who’s gone through infertility, then I started to question, well, if God didn’t allow us to have a child naturally, am I supposed to be a mom at all? you know, and so that shame came up. So that’s why I was saying when I talk about it, It’s a short succinct kind of explanation but there’s so much that went into this journey of getting to a place now where I’m okay either way, and I can say that actually without crying which is maybe like four years
Julie Pearson 53:07
Jamila Jackson 53:08
I would say that I can say that now without crying because I really do mean it.
Julie Pearson 53:10
Jamila Jackson 53:10
Even though that hope is still there.
Julie Pearson 53:12
Well, I have to give you some hope here today. So I have a dear friend who was on my board and she still is kind of just a great person and she’s in her middle age.
Jamila Jackson 53:23
Julie Pearson 53:24
She is over the 50 Yeah. She wasn’t able to have children either, tried, same thing miscarriages and God has just given them the best surprise. They decided at 50 something years old to go and get some frozen embryo.
Jamila Jackson 53:44
Julie Pearson 53:46
And they planted them in her.
Jamila Jackson 53:45
Julie Pearson 53:47
Her doctor got her ready healthy, wise and everything to be able to carry the child and she is a mama today.
Jamila Jackson 53:54
That’s awesome, that is so awesome.
Julie Pearson 53:56
Is that amazing? It’s never too late.
Jamila Jackson 53:58
Julie Pearson 54:00
That’s Sarah’s story. Was it Sarah?
Jamila Jackson 54:02
And she was 90.
Julie Pearson 54:03
90, that’s right, she was 90 [Laughing]; so it’s like it’s such so neat to see her story.
Jamila Jackson 54:06
Julie Pearson 54:07
Because man, that is a testimony of enduring, and waiting, and being patient, and being faithful, faithful to the desire.
Jamila Jackson 54:16
Julie Pearson 54:17
I think that’s kind of in a nutshell and I want to get to kind of what God has done now with your ministry but he is faithful to the desires of our heart. I have to make this reminder of myself too, just because my dream seems broken, it doesn’t mean that God’s going to completely discount it.
Jamila Jackson 54:43
Julie Pearson 54:44
He creates new dreams for us. So let’s talk about your new dreams, your misery. From misery came a ministry; from your misery came a ministry. So tell us about how God has restored you with this big purpose of your life?
Jamila Jackson 55:02
Yeah, well, it’s funny because some of my friends call our boxes of encouragement my children.
Julie Pearson 55:08
That’s so cute.
Jamila Jackson 55:10
They are like you mailed out your little children [cross talking]. I know, right? Yeah, yeah.
Julie Pearson 55:14
Yes, oh my gosh!
Jamila Jackson 55:16
People are like, oh, it’s like email that’s like you create them and you mailed out and he really did birth a ministry in me that I didn’t know it was there. I’ve always been a person who, I’ve actually suffered from depression and things throughout my life, that’s a whole other story, but I’ve also been a person who’s always kind of seen things as glass is half full, I’m a pretty positive person in general. And so, I’ve always kind of been an encourager, just naturally, I didn’t really realize that it was my spiritual gift until going through again, this whole infertility battle. And so you know, when we first started sending out the boxes, again, it was just kind of a little thing I was doing on the side and I just really found that encouraging other women and what they were going through gave me encouragement. I would have to study the Scriptures and kind of seek a deeper understanding of those different things that we all go through in order to provide that encouragement to other women.
Sometimes people refer to what we do as a subscription box and it is a monthly subscription. But it’s not a typical one where, you know, you’re getting cosmetics or shoes or for food, those are all fun, but this is literally a care package of encouragement. And so the idea is that, you know, when you receive it every single month, we have a different theme. And so this month’s theme is flourished, last month’s theme is being brave. We talked about perseverance and holding onto your perspective and God’s faithfulness.
And so the box is just the beginning. In it, there’s a gift of encouragement. That’s kind of your reminder for every month, along with some stickers, and posters, and scripture cards and things like that, and a little devotional.
Julie Pearson 56:57
That’s a visual display.
Jamila Jackson 56:58
Exactly yeah, and then we have an online community where the ladies actually talk about the topic, and we have a weekly video where we talk more about the topic, and I really encourage women, give tips and ways to stay encouraged and to kind of grow and whatever the topic is.
And so for me, it has become something that it does fulfil a dream that I never knew I had. And so again, I think as I’ve seen how much God’s been able to touch other women through this, I could have never imagined it. I always worried about what my legacy would be never if we never had, children. And I feel like he’s given me a legacy that I could have never imagined through this ministry.
Julie Pearson 57:39
This is cool. I love how you put in here and encouragement card; write a note on the postcard mail to a friend or a stranger.
Jamila Jackson 57:49
Yeah, right, because that’s the whole point, right?
Julie Pearson 57:52
Pass it on, that is so awesome, right? It’s not just for them.
Jamila Jackson 57:54
Julie Pearson 57:55
It’s now for them to give to somebody.
Jamila Jackson 57:57
Julie Pearson 57:58
Wow, this is your baby?
Jamila Jackson 58:00
Julie Pearson 58:01
These are all your babies, so you do 12 in a year, once a month?
Yes, we do them once a month.
Julie Pearson 58:06
Jamila Jackson 58:06
Every month is a different theme and then we also have a shop on the website that has some of our really popular boxes from past themes because a lot of ladies will get theirs and then they want to go send the whole box to a friend, so they’ll hold on to theirs and then send another one.
Julie Pearson 58:19
So how do people find out about you? How have you been able to build a customer base?
Jamila Jackson 58:23
Well, a lot of it has honestly been word of mouth.
Julie Pearson 58:25
Jamila Jackson 58:26
so you know again I think a part of it it’s really a mission of mine to help women be encouraged and then to encourage others around them, so if people visit loved and blessed dot com, they can learn more about our monthly membership and then we also are super excited this September we are having our first in-person gathering.
Julie Pearson 58:43
Yes, I saw that. I’m so sorry, I can’t come.
Jamila Jackson 58:46
I know September’s a busy month for a lot of people.
Julie Pearson 58:48
Yeah, yeah, but I’m super excited about it to bring what we’ve been doing online, offline and be able to hug each other in real life and encourage each other.
Jamila Jackson 58:57
Yes, that is so key, so key Well, I think we’re going to put your your link on our on our notes also.
Julie Pearson 59:05
Cool, awesome! And so it is membership, a membership per month, but you get a box and then you have an online community more encouragement. There are so many of those online communities, I love it.
Jamila Jackson 59:13
Julie Pearson 59:16
You’re reaching demographically with this.
Jamila Jackson 59:22
We have international ladies from all over the world in there and there’s every age, range every different life situations, it’s awesome.
Julie Pearson 59:28
That is so good and it’s so neat to see. What do you believe we have like, a minute left. Jamila
Jamila Jackson 59:37
Julie Pearson 59:39
So what would you say has been just your biggest blessing that you can now see from your broken dreams?
Jamila Jackson 59:47
Yeah, in all humility, honestly, I have to say that in the six years since love and blessed started and letting go of that motherhood idol in my life, the biggest thing that’s come out of my misery has actually been able to say that we’ve saved other women’s lives. We have multiple women that have not committed suicide because their box arrived at just the right time or it just had the right word, or there was somebody inside of our community who went to go visit them. Exactly, that’s why I’m like if I never have children, I’m okay because I know that he used that to do something that I could have never imagined being able to be a part of
Julie Pearson 1:00:30
Wow Jamila, you are a blessing, loved and blessed and the word, and?
Jamila Jackson 1:00:34
Yes, the website is loved and blessed dot com.
Julie Pearson 1:00:38
Loved and blessed dot come. Go check Jamila out get signed up, this is awesome to get an encouraging box every month. I just want to thank you so much, Jamila, for coming on to our show. It was a blessing to speak with you. Well, everyone we are up it is time to go.
And I will be here; we actually are going to be in studio again next week. You want to be here next week because Guess who I have in the studio? If everybody knows Frank cemetery that died in a motorcycle accident on kk La, I’m interviewing his wife, oh my goodness, Gina. Gina Pastori will be on the revived podcast in the studio next week. So don’t miss it, it’s going to be awesome.
So thank you, Jamila for coming out, all the way from LA everyone, everyone have a wonderful week. And remember that God is a God who restores us in the difficult areas of our life, so be loved and be blessed. I am. Thank you, everyone, we’ll see you next week. Bye-bye.